Why It’s Okay Not To Love Your Job

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There’s that age-old saying we’ve all been told that if you find a job you love, you’ll never work a day in your life. But is that true? And how about that expectation that you actually should love your job, even if it’s just one you applied for with the sole purpose of funding your life?

We’ve all been there in an interview where a potential employer has described the work life at their business as a family, but it’s easy to miss the subtle connotations that entails. For family, we will go above and beyond. For family, we will go out of our way to help. For family, we will change our plans. But that’s because they are exactly that – family. Why are we expected to treat a transactional business agreement as we do close personal relationships?

Here’s the thing: we don’t have to. Contrary to popular belief, it’s perfectly fine – if not encouraged – to see your work as nothing more than something that funds your life.

Why, Where, And When Did This Start?

This idea that we should love our job is a con designed to guilt-trip us into working extra for no pay. Or – as in recent cases, given the cost of living crisis and the union strikes – work more for less (when pay rises or lack thereof do not match inflation). And that’s not even the worst part: so many of these cases are coming from businesses that are making huge profits! Sure, not as big a profit as they were making in previous years, but a disproportionately more significant amount than that of the workers who actually do the work to make that profit in the first place.

So, where does this unfair, oppressive, capitalist concept that you have to love your job come from? My theory is that it starts in childhood (duh). Think about it: children as young as nursery age are dressed up in police or doctor uniforms, and then not long after that, we start asking them what they want to be when they grow up. And it’s confusing. Because we’re not asking them what they want to be when they grow up; we’re asking them what job they’d like to have when they grow up.

I can’t be the only one who thinks that’s strange. Asking a child which job they want when the great majority of adults I know see their job as draining at best and literally illness-inducing at worst. It reminds me of that (potentially John Lennon) quote:

“When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy.’ They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.”

An Empty Promise: High Risk, Low Reward

Something that I think is often disregarded when having this conversation is that it is entirely possible to do your job well and be successful, all while not loving it. Not loving your job doesn’t equal hating it; if you hate your job, you should absolutely try and find something else. But if the fact that you haven’t yet found a job that you love is bringing you down, consider this: your job is only a small part of your identity (or at least it can be if you choose it).

This is not to say that we should all do jobs we don’t like. If you have a job you love, that’s amazing, and you’re so lucky. I just think it would be healthier for us all if we could move away from this expectation that we have to love it. In fact, I know several people who are self-proclaimed ‘workaholics,’ and they experience more work-related stress than anyone else I know. It has the power to overtake your life with very little positive return for you.

We are told that we should love our job because then we can be paid in the ‘satisfaction’ it gives us. But last I checked, satisfaction does not pay the bills or for the life experiences we want to have or for the quality family and friends time that’s so important to our souls. And if it’s the big-scale recognition you’re seeking, I promise you: you’ll be remembered far more for the kind of person you are than for any work you ever did.

And this problem is particularly relevant at the moment in Britain, given the industrial action unions and their workers have been driven to. We, the people, are expected to take what little is given to us and be thankful for it, despite the fact it’s pushing us into poverty. All while we watch the rich get richer. And now the government is trying to limit our right to strike.

Join the Rebellion

The simple fact of the matter is that the working class is powerful, and the ruling class is scared. For some time now, there has been building unrest due to the inequalities we face, and time and time again, the government and big corporations have refused to help. What we’re seeing now are the consequences, and I, for one, am thrilled about it. At the end of the day, not loving your job is a rebellion of sorts.

So, in this time of working-class empowerment, I implore you to evaluate your relationship with work. Are you selling your soul for nothing but pennies and an empty promise of success if you just work that tiny bit harder or a tiny bit longer, or for a tiny bit less? I hate to be cliche, but we really do only have one life. Why waste it chasing the unattainable? Because that’s exactly what the success you are promised is: unattainable. Never forget: you are much closer to being in poverty than to being a billionaire or even a millionaire.

Once I had this realisation and set clear boundaries at work, my relationship with work improved greatly. I no longer work extra unpaid hours or through my lunch break (other than particular exceptions), I have never once downloaded any work apps or emails on my phone, and if I am unable to meet deadlines due to variables outside of my control, I try my best to remember that it’s okay! And honestly? Since making these changes to my life, I have experienced significantly lower work-related stress. Not caring too much has been great for my mental health. And for all the sceptics out there: my career has not taken a hit since doing it.

You are worth more, and your life is worth more. I know there are things you want to experience and places you want to visit. Don’t sacrifice them, because those are the things that will enrich and fulfil you! Work to live, don’t live to work. Work as little as you can to live the life you want, and release yourself from the oppressive nature of false capitalistic ‘ambition.’ You won’t regret it.

Words by Becky Lauder


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